Monthly Archives: March 2011

Worst Albums Of All Time: Red Hot Chili Peppers – “Californication”

I have to be honest – I’ve never liked the Red Hot Chili Peppers. They just always seemed so silly. Their socks-on-cocks, misogynistic frat-boy attitude never sat well with me, but I’m willing to forgive a lot if the songs are good enough. Unfortunately, as far as I’m concerned, they aren’t, and never have been. Song after song of mid-tempo, snore infused, slap bass twaddle (slap bass has never been cool, for the record) that has me reaching for the cyanide capsule every time. They should tour with Ben Harper and Jack Johnson (watch this space, I’m sure) as the “Sure Fire Insomnia Cure Tour”. They would make millions. Even their supposed “classic” album Blood Sugar Sex Magick does absolutely nothing for me. “‘Under the Bridge’ is deep. It’s about heroin addiction, man”. Are you sure it’s not about Mandrax? Because that’s how I feel when I listen to their … Read more

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The State of Modern Music by Steven Sourman – Part Two – Hip-hop: Music?

Introducing our newest contributor: Steven Sourman. In an attempt to balance out what Steven has referred to as the “liberal hipsterness” of Riot Radio, we’ve employed Steven to offer his more “traditional” view of music, for our more conservative readers. Good evening, I assume you are reading this in the evening, as this is clearly a ‘personal interest’ website entry and you couldn’t be doing that at work.  If you are, cease and desist viewing this content at once!  You will get fired because as we all know the internet sucks away time from your working day.  Also, what you may not be aware of is that the internet not only sucks away your working hours but it somehow sucks away valuable information about your company. Or your life. Be vigilant! To be honest, the internet should be avoided at all costs unless you are sitting at home, you are done with … Read more

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Top songs: Get Cape. Wear Cape. Fly – “Moving Forward”

Ever listened to an album dozens of times, and then one day suddenly realise how brilliant one of the songs is – one that you had never noticed before? This happened to me the other day, with Get Cape. Wear Cape. Fly’s song “Moving Forward” from his second album Searching For The Hows and Whys. GCWF is one of my favourite artists. He writes sublime acoustic folk with home made beats – folktronica before there was folktronica. His first album The Chronicles of a Bohemian Teenager, realeased in 2006, is actually one of my favourite albums of all time – one of those albums you can just listen to from start to finish, that make you feel like you’ve found something that you’ve always been looking for musically. As it happens Searching For The Hows And Whys (2008) is actually my least favourite of his three albums (he released his … Read more

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Part two of the Riot Radio vs The Egonomist Podcast is up now.

The second part of me guesting on The Egonomist’s podcast is up now. We got progressively drunk as the night wore on so as I predicted, the content gradually degenerated into us yelling insults at each other got exponentially awesomer and awesomer! This time we talk about the future of music, the death of the CD, Vodka podcasts (“Vodcasts!” – see what I mean?) and the quality of the book stores around Wellington(?!). “Books are great” – Me on this podcast. Deep man, deep. Download it here (right click and save as). Or get the first podcast we did here. Tweet

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The world will be a better place with a new Glasvegas album in it

Glasvegas’ eponymous debut from 2008 was a life affirming album. From the moment the drums kicked in on opener “Flowers and Football Tops” you had a sharp intake of breath and a sudden realisation: this is what rock music should sound like. Second track and single “Geraldine” was arguably the song of 2008, and tracks like “Go Square Go”, “It’s My Own Cheating Heart That Makes Me Cry” and “Daddy’s Gone” – to name just a few of the absolutely stunning tracks on offer – all added up to a classic rock album of the highest order. The word “epic” is overused and cliched, yet it’s the perfect word to describe Glasvegas’ music. Mid tempo, grandiose and studio crafted, vocals delivered in a thick Glaswegian brogue by singer James Allan – looking uncannily like a young Joe Strummer – and beaten out by a female drummer who stands up when … Read more

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Riot Radio on The Egonomist podcast

The Egonomist is a superb Wellington based political podcast of which Dan Riot Radio is one half of. This week I appeared as a guest and we talked about music and Charlie Sheen. The two main issues facing the world at present: Check! Check out the first podcast we did here (right click and “Save link as”, or Google “download a better browser” if you’re using Internet Explorer). More Riot Radio vs The Egonomist to come, but in the meantime they can be followed on Twitter @TheEgonomist. Tweet

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Wellington – 19/03/11 – The Hunter Lounge – MGMT


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Auckland – 17/03/11 – Logan Campbell Center – MGMT


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Forget global warming: Kim Kardashian’s new single “Jam (Turn It Up)” is the worst thing to ever happen to humanity

Until this week all of us were safe in our homes, content in the knowledge that there would never be a song as bad as Ke$ha’s “We R Who We R” or The Black Eyed Peas’ “The Time (Dirty Bit)” (click those links at your own peril) ever again. However, it appears there is a new threat to the fabric of our society, a new song that is so bad it makes Paris Hilton’s solo career look like Burt Bacharach’s songbook by comparison. I am of course talking about the new song from Kim Kardashian: “Jam (Turn It Up)”, released this week: Turn It Up by mjs538 If you’re not familiar with brain numbingly retarded reality television, The Kardashians are the rich ones with screechy voices, impossibly small noses and like, real life problems and shit (404: Documentary Evidence Not Found). Kim Kardashian, the oldest – and thus most plastically … Read more

Posted in Rants, Uncategorized, Why are they famous? | 1 Comment

Best opening lyrics: The Jesus and Mary Chain – “Something I Can’t Have”

You’re in my house You’re in my face You make me hate the human race Fuck yes. The Jesus and Mary Chain, what a band. “Something I Can’t Have” is from the compilation CD The Sound of Speed which according to Wikipedia is “a compilation of singles and rare tracks”, which given that the song is far and away my favourite J&MC track, I find a little puzzling. Apparently it was originally track two on The Sound Of Speed EP – not even a single! It was playing second fiddle to the also brilliant “Snakedriver” though so I guess they can be forgiven. Just goes to show the sheer quality of their songwriting that they could afford to chuck away a song like “Something I Can’t Have” on an EP. Anyway, here’s the song. Enjoy!

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